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for just a boy…

10 Mar

i was just a boy /
stumbling / searching / for just a boy /

you saw my desperation / the begging in my eyes
still forced me on your pedestal /
got me high / told me lies /
of self-righteous pity, you are full /

you were just a boy /
stumbling / searching / for the perfect man /

i gave you the lock and key / sold my soul /
down on my knees /
offered an unconditional heart / te amo never-ending
but it wasn’t perfect / you wanted perfect /
you saw / i would never abandon you /
you abandoned me /

my love for you wasn’t silly / 
it was maddening / 
my love for you wasn’t foolish /
it was wild-eyed and free /

belittle the passion / minimize magic /
i refuse /
get me high / tell me lies /
bend me over /  i’ll play the fool / 
the joke’s on me /
while all my love pours out on you

my love for you wasn’t funny /
it was passion and strife /
i used to lie awake and watch you sleep /
wishing / hoping you’d love me the next night

you saw / i would never abandon you /
so you abandoned me /

you’re gone / but i will never leave /
never abandon / never give up /
you still have the lock and key /
just show up /

eternity may pass / age to age
i can’t stop / i won’t stop / 
desperate / with begging in my eyes
arms remain open / empty /
unashamed / 

stumbling / searching / for just a boy /
stumbling / searching / for just a boy /

written word & photography by Ephraim Beck
feet

i’ll clean it…

5 Mar

resurrection /
with one glance / 
your powers tore the veil / rolled away the stone /
a glimpse into new dimensions /
your lips dripped transcendence /

to know i have never known /
to blink / visions of sights unseen /
a wild frontier / passion and fury /
sweat and sex /
never even knew i was thirsty / 

now you take it away /
hungry / starving for just a drop /
you’re in my blood / changed my DNA /
put your magic in me / i’ll beg /
make me do the work /

spit in my mouth / let me taste it /
digging wells into dry earth /
looking for you and me / “stars forever”
put it in me / please / watch from behind /
i’ll do the work 

i’ll even clean it / 

would you give me life to leave me for dead?/
i’ll dig until i see your eyes / 
the world don’t know it yet /
boy, you’re a prophet /

go deep / spit on it / raw / 
our love was thick / it wasn’t easy /
it was just perfect /
please / let me clean it /

third eye now open / can’t go back /
i swallowed your magic/ 
born again / into my mouth / down my throat /
now i’m begging for a drop /

mysterious boy / 
resurrect me / with just one glance
push it in me /
please / i’ll clean it /

written word & photography by Ephraim Beck
IMG_4006

east davis street…

3 Mar

you did this to me /
sad street / depressed romanticism /
misery meets apathy on your corner /
love isn’t lost / no one knows to look /

you taught me what to expect / content in your decay /

eager street lamps glow / lighting the way for silent sidewalks /
you reflect in your abandoned shop windows /
can you see your own haunting? /
dreams aren’t broken / they are never dreamt

you taught me what to expect / content in your decay /

written word & photography by Ephraim Beck
street scene

kill you

1 Mar

kill me /
the dance is still there / 4 feet / 2-step /
your breath on my skin / a hand on my waist /
moving as one /

kill me / 
your eyes are still there / dark / tortured /
little boy inside / peeks out from behind / time to time /
gazing in mine /

kill me /
sleepy time is still there / tangled sheets / bed head /
naked cuddles / heavy breathing / dreams /
never felt so safe / i love you / we said

kill me /
the sex is still there / perfect / perfect
just kill me / it was perfect

kill me /
anger is still there / tears / disappointed /
hurt you badly / hurt me back / 
the pain / rage / hate myself / a knife in my chest / 

kill me / 
the love is still there / distant / ever strong /
first morning thought / last evening dream /
sweet boy / complicated soul / you captured me /

please kill me /
the longing is still there / you own me / eternal /
breathing hurts / eyes wet / i miss you /
you will never leave me  / obsession / 

kill you / 
before you kill me /

written word & photography by Ephraim Beck
reflect

apparition…

26 Feb

your exhalation vanished in the cold night air /
little orange light / alien love /
bite hard / blow it in me /
grasping /
who can hold a vengeful spirit? /

i saw you fading with the smoke in your mouth /
eyes darkened /
stupid stubborn machismo /
shattered /

your glass heart magic / swirled around us /
standing in the dark /
into your lungs / through your blood /
breathe me in /

4 feet touch / 2 hearts pound /
squeeze your sweaty hand / beg for your approval /
limbs entwined / eyes on fire /
were you an apparition? /

forever seeking around every corner /
another dimension /
to find you inside me / again /

written word & photography by Ephraim Beck
IMG_1392

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